The Power of Self-Talk

Today I looked at my resume again and noticed a mistake. I sat there, my jaw literally dropped. About once a month I update my resume in some manner—usually changing a few words here and there. I do the same thing with my cover letter and less than two weeks ago I was horrified to realize that there was an incomplete sentence in my cover letter.

Naturally, seeing this glaring error in my resume caused a flurry of fearful thoughts. How many jobs received this horrible resume from me? Why did I not notice this mistake previously? Should I reapply to those positions or just move forward with my now corrected resume and consider the previous jobs to which I applied a hopeless and lost cause?

Then came the more self-abusive questions. What is wrong with me? How could I not notice this mistake before? And after I already sent out that messed up cover letter, why am I continuing to sabotage myself? How could I be so stupid? So careless? How do I expect to get a job when I can’t even be professional enough to write something that isn’t a riddled with mistakes?

I didn’t indulge in this for more than a few instants.
I stopped. I breathed deeply. Then I replaced the thoughts with more gentle and compassionate words.

You are imperfect and made a mistake. That's okay. You are now aware of the mistakes and have already corrected them. You can update your resume on the various job search sites and do the same with your cover letter. There are other
jobs to which you can apply. Move forward. If you have the time, you can always go and reapply to the previous positions with the corrected copy of your resume and cover letter. The people who saw the incorrect ones would not recognize you if they passed you on the street so it won’t have far-reaching repercussions. Life goes on. So shall you.

I made a conscientious effort to say more positive things than I had negative. I chose to replace the self-abusive thoughts with more loving encouraging words. In essence, I said what I would to my children, reassuring them in the face of a seeming disaster in hopes of empowering them to move on.

No matter how often I remind myself to do so, I still need to be reminded to be as gentle with myself as I try to be with others. It’s good to see, I’m still open to learning and trying to learn from my mistakes.